Live Forever

You weren’t everything I had expected you to be. I hit some hard bottoms to realize that in the middle of the week. But what I didn’t see coming was what happened at Prom.
Nothing.

I had always thought Prom would be something special and new. A night I would remember. The $150 dress, the hair, make up, nails (actually the nails were) would be worth it. And even if going alone was how prom would turn out for me, it would still  be fun. It was fun for the first hour when I literally danced my stress away. I had SO much fun. Then the next hour rolled around and I was tired. I retreated to the fancy marble covered bathroom with the prom queen runner up and the skinny version Julia Roberts. We talked about their dates and the music at the dance to chew up some time. But it wasn’t enough. I then asked a couple people in my group if they wanted to take a break, none did. So i stepped outside into the lonely abyss of the courtyard. What a beautiful night it was. A bit chilly but the stars in the sky were beautiful. “If only people could be satisfied with this view” I thought to myself. What I wanted more than anything that night was to leave and be with God. Last hour I finally got some time to relax as I listened to Emily talk about her life. Man alive, I loved that more than anything! She is so funny and my friends don’t really understand her. I had a great time at Prom, it just wasn’t the kind of prom that usually goes in the story books :)

So I ask,
Prom, why the expectations? Why the narrow view? Why are you supposed to be the same experience for everyone? Because I think all of the assumptions are wrong and Prom is something small and simple. It’s probably not even half a page in the book of life. Because in real, Prom is just a dance. A time when hormone charged teenagers can jump around (and or rub their butts together) to feel something or be something that only lasts a moment, a couple words on a page.

blogilates:

Do the whole workout here

I have always the wondered about the benefits of vein in shape if you aren’t the work out type. Some people say that being in shape is the source of a good life. I didn’t think that it was the source of a “good life”. But thinking about it… If you are in shape and have something physical to pour out emotions, that will then make you have more energy and joy in life because of he freed emotions then, a better life. So I may consider becoming involved in a more regular physical exertion……

Go life!

Last night I slept with my window open. First night I was actually hot enough to open it. I woke up feeling… Perfect. I don’t know any other way to describe it. It was like a sweet, cool, presence. Everything was exactly as It should be. But then I was awakened by the normal pace of the world as my mother pulled me out of bed to go to church. I think I felt God’s presence more this morning in bed than actually going to church.

Today I went on to a choir competition up in Greeley. It was a great experience! For one of the first times in a long time I had fun performing with my choir. Take Note ( jazz choir) did an amazing Job and I learned a lot from the clinic the judges did. I couldn’t believe how nice they were about improving the our choir. I had a lot of fun with my best friends on the bus ride over. I live them so much. But I don’t understand, since they are so strong and independent like me) why they didn’t realize that “being cool” by hanging out with blazers ( people who do pot) and drunks. I don’t understand.

Another rule in the rule book to living life: face your fears! Don’t avoid or run away. I am thickly preaching this to myself to face the truth. If you don’t you end up looking bad and feeling bad. Someone might even call you a coward.

Go life

(via )

Ask your Mother about her day. Try never to complain. Be honest. Remember to not only think about God but to actually talk to him. Just because he doesn’t respond with a loud “hello”he is still listening and responding to you in a more loving way. This kind of response means the most to you because it might lead you closer to God. God has created this whole world, for YOU, to see who God is. He loves you enough to give you emotions of pleasure that involve taste, touch, color, love, praise.

I totally just blabbed what I had in my mind. Message me if you want to understand more.